1 Peter 5:7-8a " Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour."
Wow... well apparently the devil has had his fun devouring me lately. If you have read any of my past entries you know how I have let my anxiety take over me completely. This verse waited to speak to me until today because well apparently God likes to punch me in the gut exactly when I need it... I have to learn how to cast all my anxiety on Him and for me I have to also learn how to leave it there. He does not need my help with it once I have given it to Him.
He cares for me... wow what a statement. Oftentimes I sit and wonder what it would be like for someone to genuinely care for me. Unfortunately what I often fail to realize is that someone does care for me. He still cares for me even when I reject Him, even when I fail to realize that He is all I need, even when He wipes away my tears. He loves me. He cares for me.
Be alert and of sober mind... obviously I need to work on this one, who am I kidding I need to work on most everything, but being alert for me means knowing when I am having my self-doubt, my insecurities, my feelings of not being good enough, those are all the devil trying to devour me... and I have been letting him. I have to remember that I am in control of my feelings.
In chapter 5 of my Made to Crave study this week I read this: I WAS MADE FOR MORE and that hit me a little bit. I also read that any temptation is still temptation. Whether that means drugs, alcohol, sex, or the bowl of chips and dip, TEMPTATION IS STILL TEMPTATION. So when I give in to temptation, no matter how big or small it may seem to me, I am letting the devil devour me. Instead I should give my anxiety, the temptation, to Him. Why, because He cares for me...
I have to remember that I am NOT:
THE BAD GIRL
THE DRUG USER
THE GIRL WHO EVERYONE HATES
THE BAD MOTHER
THE ONE THAT IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR ANYONE
I have to remember that I AM:
MICAELA THE FORGIVEN CHILD OF GOD
MICAELA THE SET FREE CHILD OF GOD
MICAELA THE LOVED CHILD OF GOD...
I have been through some horrible things in my life because I gave into temptations and because I allowed the devil to devour me I have lived my life with anxiety about those things, those temptations I have given into have always been right at the edge of the yard waiting to come in and say "you were never strong enough to say no..." But now I know that I can cast my anxiety about those temptations on Him, because He cares for me, and with that knowledge I am strong enough to say "yes I am"
I AM MADE FOR MORE THAN EXCUSES AND VICIOUS CYCLES